欧亨利短篇小说集(29)

""Ireckonyouunderstand,"saysPaisley,"thatI"vemadeupmymindtoaccruethatwidowwomanaspartandparcelinandtomyhereditamentsforever,bothdomestic,sociable,legal,andotherwise,untildeathusdopart."
""Why,yes,"saysI,"Ireaditbetweenthelines,thoughyouonlyspokeone.AndIsupposeyouareaware,"saysI,"thatIhaveamovementonfootthatleadsuptothewidow"schanginghernametoHicks,andleavesyouwritingtothesocietycolumntoinquirewhetherthebestmanwearsajaponicaorseamlesssocksatthewedding!"
""There"llbesomehiatusesinyourprogram,"saysPaisley,chewingupapieceofarailroadtie."I"dgiveintoyou,"sayshe,"in"mostanyrespectifitwassecularaffairs,butthisisnotso.Thesmilesofwoman,"goesonPaisley,"isthewhirlpoolofSquillsandChalybeates,intowhichvortexthegoodshipFriendshipisoftendrawnanddismembered.I"dassaultabearthatwasannoyingyou,"saysPaisley,"orI"dendorseyournote,orrubtheplacebetweenyourshoulder-bladeswithopodeldocthesameasever;buttheremysenseofetiquetteceases.InthisfracaswithMrs.Jessupweplayitalone.I"venotifiedyoufair."